Should I go with my dad to put my dog (and best friend) down?

 Posts: 1Member
My dad is putting my dog down this week. Murphy is an almost 14 year old chocolate lab and unofficially has congestive heart failure. He is very healthy for his age but has some trouble breathing if he gets too worked up and has had a few "episodes" where he can't catch his breath, has foam coming from his mouth, and poops at the same time. He has been my dog from the time we got him when I was about 4 and has been my best friend and almost a brother to me. My dad wants to know if I want to be there when he goes to put him down. I don't know if I should be with him or if I should avoid a possibly traumatic moment when he dies. I don't want to abandon him and make him possibly feel alone and like he is being punished for something, but at the same time, I don't want one traumatic, bad moment at the end to possibly overshadow all the good times we have shared. I'm crying just trying to type this. Please help.

Best Answers

  • Tiffany CarsonTiffany Carson St. MarysPosts: 15,800Member
    Accepted Answer
    They say that a dog is happiest if he dies among his family, and I agree with that sentiment. I know it's not easy at all. His death may be overwhelming to think about at first, but ultimately it will not replace those good memories. Time does indeed heal wounds. However, the decision is your's to make and your's alone. If I may ask, have you had him examined by a vet to make absolutely sure that his problems are not treatable? There may be hope yet. If cost is an issue, is loaning some money from a friend, selling something you don't need, or using a payment plan a possibility? Hoping things turn out for the best in any case.
  • dona timoneydona timoney Posts: 46Member
    Accepted Answer
    I've had to send a few dogs and cats to the rainbow bridge, my last pup Charlie was a rescue and 16 & 1/2 yrs old. My vet came to my house to put him at rest. It is heart breaking as well as comforting to know that you are holding him in your arms and heart as he passes. when you decide whether to be there or not do not second guess your choice, it will tear you up inside. however, I would choose to be there. I still 1 yr. later feel the presence of my dog in my house. Now I'm crying... He will be waiting for you to cross over the rainbow bridge when you meet again. may you find peace...
  • Accepted Answer are only 14, & yes, it is a big issue to deal with. No one here would fault you if you do not witness this. If Charlie has your Dad there he will not be alone. Charlie will not think you abandoned him. A compromise would be to go with them to the vet, but stay in the waiting room while it is actually being done. Then, if you feel you are up to it you can join your dad & Charlie. Do not feel guilty about whatever you decide. My ex-hubby..a big construction guy...could not handle being in the room when we put our last dog down. If you need support, dogster has an excellent Saying Good-bye Forum.
  • Liz HardersenLiz Hardersen GranbyPosts: 5,862Member
    Accepted Answer
    I hope my answer comes in time. Yes, go with your dog. You may want to leave for a few minutes while the Vet gives the shots. Usually they give two shots, the first is medication to make them fall asleep. You could stay for that shot. The second medication stops the muscles, so his breathing and heart will slow, then stop. This can be tough to watch, so you could go out for a while. But you can go back in afterwards to see him. My sons were 13 and 11 when Candy died. They met me at the Vets office to say final goodbyes. It was important to let our dog know we loved her and did not want her to be alone. Because she was so horribly sick and in pain, it was comforting for my sons and I to see her no longer in any pain. It won't ruin your memories of the good times. You can know that you were there every time he needed you. Having a pet means taking care of them for their entire life and sometimes even their death
  • sheila marshallsheila marshall Posts: 155Member
    Accepted Answer
    Only you know the best way to say goodbye. If you don't go with your dad, will you regret it forever. I have been with all my dogs as they left this world and it is upsetting to see your best friend die, watching him die seeing him free from illness may make you feel better in time. You will never forget the good times you shared over the years.
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